Truthfully, we almost cannot say we were ever together in 2011, since we met online and only start talking serious for about a few months. We parted ways in 2011 and she immediately got engaged and planned on starting a family. I had hooked up with the craziest
By 2012, me ex-cebuana and I were talking again. She broke off her relationship with her fiance and I broke up with my crazy-mindanao girlfriend.
Before my 2012 Philippine vacation I had gotten offers from several girls who wanted to meet me. Since I am black, I am surprised that I had so many offers since most Filipinas are not into black. But all the ones that I had met were exceptions to the rule. There were 5 Filipinas: there were two mature, 30+ Filipinas wanting something serious. There was one very cool friend who I was supposed to meet to potentially start a local store with. Her and I had know each other for over a year online and were anxious to finally meet.. though I admit she wanted more than just friendship. Then there was my super crazy ex Mindanao girlfriend.. ok, yes.. not a good idea to meet her (IN MINDANAO) and lastly there was the Ex Cebuana girlfriend that I had really loved.
I ended up going to meet both exes. The reason was that I really wanted to have a serious relationship. Really, it was not just for sex. What I found out on the trip is that the crazy ex-Mindanao gf had been scamming me. I found out that she had been with several guys while she was with me and one of them had actually gotten her pregnant. She also had a Filipino guy very close to where she lived there in Magsaysay. She was playing a bunch of guys all at once to get everything she needed from them (money, comfort, support, sex, etc). She lived in the province partly in the jungle. Water came out of a pump and electricity was not reliable. While I was there she paraded me around like I was a trophy. But after all I learned, I realized breaking up had been a great idea. While in Mindanao, I had been in a den of snakes.
The Cebuana ex, gave me an experience that was something I cannot even describe. She cared for me. I felt like a king and had never felt so welcomed and loved than with her. At the time I felt like Cebu City might be my new home, but you know it was not really Cebu, it was her.. being with her felt like home. We were like soulmates (for lack of a better word). We went to Boracay went all over Cebu and just enjoyed each others company. That week I learned just how good life could be. I did not realize that it could feel that good and that fulfilling to be with someone. We had an amazing time and it was like something you only see in movies.
All these women of the Philippines faced many of the same problems, but handled them very differently. All of them face financial difficulties on their OWN. They had all had Filipino ex-boyfriends, ex-fiances, exhusbands but all had been abandoned by them. Most had at least one child. And ALL were expected to take care of their entire family.. not only their own kids but their parents, brothers and sisters and sometimes even aunts and uncles.
My crazy Mindanao-ex handle this burden by running as many scams as she could. The mature Filipinas handled it by becoming a wife to as good a man as they could find and staying with him as long as they could stand it. My impression of Filipino women is that they are strong because they are forced to be. They must do it on their own mostly because they are left to fend for themselves. Its made them resourceful survivors and in most cases completely devoted wives. Though I had many bad experiences, over all I have a positive impression of amazing women with a hunger for love in an impoverished developing situation. I think this is their decade to rise up and earn success all over the world.
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